45: Why Is It Taking Me So Long To Get What I Want?



There are moments in our life when we have a desire that’s so big and clear. We really want something so badly, yet we feel like it’s taking too long to come. In those moments of waiting, we’re telling ourselves that it’s not working or that maybe it’s not meant for us. We start to doubt ourselves, compare, and feel overwhelmed by the lack of progress. Why is it taking so long for us to create this thing in our life? Today, we’re going to talk about why things are taking longer than expected and how to speed up the manifestation and creation process.


There are three reasons why things take longer than you expect to occur.


System vs Individual

The first reason is that you’re creating as part of a system instead of as an individual. When you have complete autonomy or control over a situation, you will be able to move faster. You’re the only decision maker. Therefore, you get to create exactly what you want when you want it. If you desire to move across the country. It’s up to you to pack, find a new place to live and go. However, if you’re part of a larger system like a family, community or organization – you aren’t the only one who is affected by the decision. You have to get others on board and move thing along together. Being a part of a system is a decision that you are making regardless of whether you realize it or not. To decide that you want to be a part of a larger system means that there are times when you move slower. There’s nothing wrong with that decision, but realize that it’s a decision and priority that you made. 


How do we speed up a system creation? We get people involved. When we want to create as part of a larger system whether it’s your family or a larger company, we need to involve others. One strategy is to begin letting others in on what your desires are and sharing your ideas more broadly. Another strategy is to begin to involve others in the creation process so that they co-create the outcome and desire with you. Instead of resenting, you begin to involve. Instead of blaming, you allow their energy to help you create something with an even greater impact. Remember, this was a decision that you made to be part of a larger system so therefore if you want to move forward quickly, you need to do so in harmony with the system.


Do you really want it?

The second reason it’s taking longer to create the outcome that you desire is that you don’t really want this outcome. If there’s a hidden competing desire, you’ve got to unearth it now. Is this outcome going to bring up things that you don’t want? Do you believe it’s going to add more work or stress to your life in some way? Do you believe that you’re not worthy of this result or outcome? What is the reason you may not truly want this thing. When you’re not fully aligned, you’re not going to be going after it with your full power and energy. Without this full power and energy, your speed is reduced and you’re a match for something slower or even nothing at all.


What do you do when you’re seeing that you don’t believe you really want it? You ask yourself exactly what is the hidden competing desire. Then you solve for it. If you wanted to start a new career but you’re worried about the financial risk, this worry is telling you something. It’s not just telling you not to go after your career though. It’s telling you to solve for the finances so that you can go after the your new career. We often believe it’s an either/or situation. Either I do this, or I don’t. What if it was a “and” situation? I do this “and” do that? See your concern as the way through and you’ll be able to knock that competing desire down by solving for it. The easiest way is usually through.


The Unexpected

The third reason that you’re not manifesting or creating your results as quickly as you desire is because something better is out there. This looks like you realizing that you already have everything you need. This looks like you seeing a better opportunity. This looks like grace. This is the unknown and unexpected that shows up and changes the course of our lives, if we let it.


Ask yourself, is this the moment where I see that I have an unexpected opportunity showing up in some area of my life that is actually supporting me? What if another door is now open and what’s on the other side is also something I truly desire as well? We often don’t get what we want. We get what we need. Do your part, but truly take notice of the opportunities around you and how they might actually be solving for the problem you thought you had. Rejection can be protection, and it doesn’t mean that you’ll never have what you desire, but maybe there’s a reason. We’ll understand it fully in hindsight but we don’t understand it now. That seeming loss of control may be difficult, but how we take control is by resolving to see that we still have agency in how we tell the story of what this all means to us and for us. By accepting what is, we can move the needle faster because we have clarity on what is really an obstacle versus an opportunity. You still get to write the story and with grace on your side, it will fill in where you least expected.


Above all, understand that time can speed up if you really know why you’re attempting this goal. It’s not the goal you want. It’s the person you become along the way. The type of person who leads, who has certainty, who creates, who loves, who cares, who gives and who thrives. This person is always available for you to step into even if the end result feels like it’s still not here. When you step into the power of the person that you’re looking to become. When you can change youre relationship with yourself to one where you hold yourself in high regard, you change everything. You suddenly feel that time is on your side. You feel that you’re enjoying the process. You feel that you have certainty about what is happening and why. The timing becomes a non-issue. Those who know, can afford to wait.


If you resonate with this content and want to know how to apply this to your life, schedule a complimentary 1:1 session with me here at www.mayempson.com/contact. Limited spots available.

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