Welcome to episode #183 of the Own Your Best Life Podcast. If you’ve ever felt frustrated that “this is it” in life and that whatever job, role or health you currently have is the pinnacle, then you’re likely at the cusp of your next big leap. It could be a transition in your career or a turning point in the season of your life, but either way – that itch for growth, change and for new energy to come into your life is there. I am in the process of taking my next big leap and in today’s podcast, I want to share with you what I’m doing right now to clear space for the leap.
I can sometimes be impatient for the next thing to arrive. I have grown accustomed to knowing that feeling when it comes – the one that tells me that THIS is the idea and a great idea – that it’s not unusual for me to be in the period of excitement and work when inspiration comes. Yet, it doesn’t always feel like life is fully inspiring and what I’ve also realized is that all the moments before, were preludes to those big inspirational moments. In fact, it’s not even the thing that occurs in that moment, but the sense of congruence that what you’re thinking and feeling makes sense. Taking action becomes easy.
Yet, we’re often not even aware that we’re having inspirational moments. We’re not aware of the level of intense joy and fearlessness we can have at this very moment. We’re sleeping through our days and impatiently waiting to wake up. What if that wasn’t the case though? What if there were natural ebbs and flows of energy and that your lower points are making space for what’s coming next?
This is what I believe. I used to think that I needed to hurry it all along. Hurry up and get past the lower ebbs of energy. Hurry up and just do stuff. But the biggest thing about hurrying is the energy that comes with hurrying. If we hurry and are impatient because we think we’re trying to arrive somewhere and go somewhere else, that assumes that somewhere else is better than where we are. The assumption is that life right now, can be better. The truth is that yes, it likely can get better. The question becomes can we feel ok about life even if we know it can get better?
Not everything has to go your way for it to be helping you make space. Do you remember a time that something didn’t go your way? I remember for me, it was in college – thinking that I wanted to go to Italy to study abroad. It seemed so romantic and just that feeling of “ahhh…Italy.” As I was completing the application, I found out that there was a language requirement to study at the Bocconi Institute – and I didn’t know Italian. Well, there goes my plan.
I went down the list and saw that Hong Kong was on the list of places I could study abroad, and there wasn’t a language requirement there – they taught in English. I had just come back from 2 weeks with my family there and I remembered that it was fun – all this great shopping, a bustling city, yummy food – let’s do it. I didn’t know what to expect but off to Hong Kong it was. So I was excited and thought about all the amazing backpacking I would do and the adventures I would have. Then the moment arrived after taking airplanes and buses with luggage (what were we thinking?) – I was in Hong Kong – at the University of Science and Technology to study business for 6 months. A school looking out onto the water, open air with amazing views – and even though I arrived at night – I could feel how different this place was than the US. I went into my dorm, closed the door and looked at myself in the mirror thinking, “What if this was a bad idea? I’m so far away from my family. I’ve never been this far for so long.” It sunk in – that feeling of “what did I do?”
Then I backpacked and met amazing people at the school. Met my now husband, Jay – and became friends with him. I even started blogging during that time, journaling and writing again. An explosion of growth with food, travel, friendship and love. From the most unexpected and unknown destinations and places. Not knowing anyone or anything about what was going to happen. I came back, and then found out from someone who studied in Italy that there wasn’t a language requirement. I could have gone – and isn’t it funny how life works. Would I have met Jay? Who knows?
Big leaps often require us to make space for the unknown. To see when plans go awry that they are opportunities to clear the way for what’s to come. We will go through those moments of ups and downs where we make the decision, then see how we get stuck. We’ll find a solution, get excited and do the work to get there. Then we’ll wonder if we’re making the right decision again. In all of this, we’re constantly making space for the next thought, decision and idea to come through. Ones that we’ve never had before. New thoughts and energy that allow us to be ok with self-doubt and the unpredictability of the human experience.
When I made my transition into a new line of work, coaching and training – I’ve had those moments of excitement and inspiration as well as those moments where there’s self-doubt. I’ve wondered if I made the right decisions along the way. What has helped me through that was realizing that I am creating my own version of life. When I follow my intuition, constantly creating space for what’s next to come into my life by following my intuition, even when it’s not just telling me that everything is working. Not everything always feels good, but in the moments of clarity that come from the messiness of life, I’ve found that it comes back to allowing myself to find space for more expansive thinking.
When I create space in terms of getting out of my head by traveling or meditating or going on retreat, I’ve found that there are macro decisions that I’m not going back on and there are micro decisions that are worth revisiting. The mind often follows the body so ways that I remind myself what’s important is to go to new places, have expansive views like from a mountain top, write and read on airplanes. My formula always includes the spiritual. The question of what life is really about and what am I here to give and to receive. When I tap into my spiritual energy – the one that just fuels everything else – I come back from my meditations, from my trips and retreats like a new person. I feel so reinspired, invigorated and full of life. It feels like a fountain of youth and I used to think that it was selfish to spend time by myself for myself. It seemed so trite to say that I came back with more love for my family even though I was away from the family, but it was the truth.
When I create space for myself to be – it will look like finally saying yes to a purchase that I’ve been wanting to make, going to places I’ve wanted to go and to say things that I’ve wanted to say. This works for me because my conditioning is often to withhold and to assume that what I wanted wasn’t as important and it is easy for me to dig into myself and to just want to give up everything when it’s not working. So this idea of allowing myself to take up space, to want things and to not be upset if I don’t get it is the key. The more I’m aware that I care about what others think, the more that I can create space for myself to be diplomatic and direct. I’ve realized that you don’t have to swing on the pendulum of people-pleasing and then resentment. You can be intelligent about decisions and adventurous. Being fearless doesn’t mean being callous and thoughtless about your decisions.
Creating space looks like an expansion of my capabilities and I encourage you to think the same for yourself. What’s strong gets even stronger and more bold. It lifts you up and everyone around you. Who I am now at 41 is who I was when I was a child and I’ve realized that the next big leap isn’t about changing who I am but become even more myself – to be even more courageous to do what works for me, and help others make space to do what works for them. This is what is so exciting about the next big leap – the underlying assumption that as I grow and expand – that it helps others around me. It might be uncomfortable for them, but it’s still helpful because if I can hold the energy of what I really desire, it’s coming from a clean place. If it doeesn’t feel like it’s clean, I clean it up because often that is what holds me back. The worry that I’ll hurt someone in the process. It takes a certain level of decision-making for me to leave the all or nothing approach and find that there are so many solutions to the problems that we’re facing. If we’re ok with all of them, then we’ll figure it out. It’s truly the beliefs we have that we shouldn’t make mistakes, or that we should or should do something a specific way – that keeps us where we are, looking at the leap but never taking it.
I know this one might have been a bit meta, but wanted to share what’s on my mind and how I think about creating space for the big leap.
If you’re on the cusp of your next big leap, we’re enrolling in the next round of Spiritual Achiever coaching. This month, we’ll dive into emotions and the intelligence that this mind/body connection can offer you about what’s next and what to do now about the biggest decisions in your life. Are you ready for it? You can join now by going to https://mayempson.com/spiritualachiever.
Want to know more about what happens when you join?
- When you join Spiritual Achiever® Coaching you’ll be supported for a full year: Career Revelation Academy: A 5-step career change process (if you have a job you want to stay in, I’ll show you how to love it even more) that can launch you into your next career chapter in 30 days.
- 2x/month group training and coaching on Spirituality, Achievement, Earth Energy and Harmony. You’ll know how to design your days for breakthroughs, create a personal brand and community, lead yourself and others through change, become more physically and mentally fit, reduce stress and reinvent what’s possible in this next chapter of your life.
- Discover your Leadership Strengths and Branding Workshop: Increase your awareness of what makes YOU different from others and how to become even better at your genius zone.
- Your Best Year workshop: Create your one year plan and design this next year, no matter what time of the year it is.
- Your Next 5 Years one-day virtual retreat: Vision what’s possible 5 years from now and break out of your old routines so you can step into new habits, behaviors and routines.
- Tickets to all in-person Spiritual Achiever retreats (accommodations not included): Highly immersive and intimate gatherings where we spend time in nature, experience energy work, eat and move well – all while making big decisions and committing to what’s next for us.
- Monthly 1:1 Coaching Sessions: To help you break through obstacles, define your individual path, and to work on both strategy and mindset.
The next step?
Schedule a consultation to get clarity on how coaching can help you on your journey.
Once you’re accepted into the program, you’ll receive a calendar invite for a 2-hour deep dive 1:1 session to map out your personal goals and your own year-long journey.
You’ll have immediate access to the Spiritual Achiever process and philosophy – how to achieve your biggest goals and reinvent your life.
You’ll have immediate access to 5 modules of Career Revelation Academy – to love your career even more and launch that next chapter of your career in 30 days.
You’ll have the calendar invites for the upcoming group calls and retreats.
If this speaks to you, I can’t wait to talk to you live: Schedule a consultation.
Reach out at www.mayempson.com/contact for more information on my Spiritual Achiever coaching program. You’ll figure out what’s next and actually go and do it.
If you like this blend of both practicality and mindset, you will love coaching. You can schedule a consultation to learn more about working together and joining this community of like-minded, open and curious seekers. It is the powerful group and private coaching hybrid experience for achievers who want to expand their vision of what’s possible. Twelve months of support, individualized guidance, community and retreats. We will help you build your confidence, trust your intuition and make decisions that you love.
That’s it for this week. Have an amazing one and I’ll talk to you next time.