Welcome to episode #213 of the Own Your Best Life Podcast. When work takes over our lives, it’s hard for us to feel a sense of separation between ourselves and our work. We live, breathe and sleep thinking about our work. At the same time, we’re happy when we don’t have to focus on it as much and we start to wonder why our work feels like it is all encompassing?

Today’s podcast is on creating a full life where you can love your work, but it isn’t the most interesting about you.

The summer is such an interesting time to reflect on work and our focus on work. We tend to take more breaks during the summer and it’s more socially accepted to take time off given school schedules and this idea that it’s more ok to enjoy our summers. 

I’ve recently come back from a big trip to Japan with the extended family – we had 9 people traveling together and the interesting thing is we might have had one conversation about work across the entire 12 days. For a variety of reasons, whether it’s because they’re not in the same industries or they have less knowledge about what we do – it’s just not the focus.

Instead, the focus is on what we’re doing now – enjoying the views, the food and the unexpected surprises along the way. Some of the people who care about us the most – and whom we share deep relationships with, don’t care about our work the way we do. They care more about our wellbeing and whether or not we seem to be fulfilled. Yet, we spend such a large portion of our lives so focused and anxious about work that it often takes over and affects the way we interact with other people. Even on trips.

It’s normal due to the busy schedules to keep working on vacations and time away. There’s nothing wrong with that, but it’s one of the reasons why we almost have no time to truly disconnect from the work we do. New projects, emergencies, requests and demands to see progress on shorter and shorter timelines create a pressure to hurry up and figure things out at work. With all the meetings and firefighting, we tend to find that the only time to do work is in the after-hours or early mornings. Weekends become a great time to do work because there are fewer emails and distractions.

It then starts this process of wanting to see results from all the work that you’re putting in, getting satisfaction from the results and then putting in even more time. What we focus on grows so eventually we do have really interesting and fulfilling work that we can truly be proud of and where we can see our expertise growing. This is one of the best case scenarios of dream jobs becoming real jobs.

Even here, however, we become aware that if we can have such amazing work lives, why can’t we do the same in our personal lives as well? What would occur, if we put a fraction of effort into the biggest areas of our lives that would create outsized results? Our health, wellbeing and relationships for example. These things truly affect the quality of our lives and can take a backseat as we grow our careers and ambitions.

We start to ask ourselves if we’re as proud of our personal accomplishments as we are about our work ones? Are we in the top 1% in terms of health, relationships and quality of life outside of work? Whether or not this percentage is your expectation or not, the way we measure and define success outside of work is often overlooked because we don’t spend as much time or energy thinking about it as we do our work.

Yet, what if that wasn’t the case? What if your work was the least interesting thing about you? What if your work was an output of who you are as an individual? The quality of presence, energy and leadership that you bring to all of life, not just one aspect? You might find that you don’t need to get all of your joy from work anymore and that you’re more ok with it being a bit boring or mundane at times. 

You don’t have to travel for work as much because you get to travel in your personal life. You don’t have to make the best friends in your work because you also have relationships outside of work. You don’t have to make all your money in your work, because you’re also thinking about who you are and how you earn outside of this one job or organization. 

The most influential person in your life is you and if you’re not inspired by yourself or who you are, you’ll tend to look outside of yourself to find the fun and the joy – forgetting that you are the one who brings this to the work and the situation. You’ll think that you’re getting passed over or that you’re not as supported instead of finding that it’s easier to create support when you have a clear direction of the path forward but aren’t so tied to making things work in only the way you think it should work.

You will have changes in the organization and business that you’re in – often outside of your control. When your work becomes everything, all your eggs are in the proverbial work basket and setbacks, failures and hard changes create much more of a dramatic negative impact than necessary. Those leaders that can sustain success across their lives are often seen as visionaries in their work, but they also have a strong point of view about their lives. They’re known for their work but their work is an output of the thinking that they have and the type of person they are. Instead of work becoming the reason they’re successful, they create success because of how they work and who they are.

How do you do this? How do you create a life where your work is not the most interesting thing about you?

First, you focus on what I call your personal success map. This helps you map out the strategy for taking what you care about and creating multiple happy endings for your life. Many of which can be achieved but at different times. This takes you out of the comparison game thinking that someone else has it figured out, but not you. It also takes the pressure off of making only one thing work because you start to see where you are and the different paths you can take that will still be fulfilling. This also takes into account your personal interests and life goals, even if you’re unclear how to fit them into your busy life. I have clients who have come from overwhelmingly stressful jobs that are able to find new and different ways to integrate their kids and personal lives into their work lives to feel a different sense of balance again.

You don’t have to do any of this, but I want to offer that you do have the opportunity to go down a new path where life is more abundant with opportunities, joy and experiences beyond and including work. You can continue to make work everything and not see the personal life you desire or you can create a different path forward where work is not the most interesting thing about you even if you love your work and what you do.

You can have a more balanced life with more interests that you get to explore – and see how that affects your work life in the best of ways. You can bring your humanness and genuine authenticity into your work by having more human experiences outside of work that influence the way you live your life and work. 

If you want to stand out and lead in this way, where work isn’t the most interesting thing about you – even if you are proud, engaged and interested in your work – I invite you to join the movement of spiritual achievers who are creating holistic success on their terms.

If you’d like to become a spiritual achiever, I invite you to watch the free training on how to Stand Out and Lead, using spiritual, high-performance strategies: STAND OUT AND LEAD.

You can apply to join my Spiritual Achiever® program, where you’re going to create your next chapter with spiritual and high-performance strategies to achieve time and financial freedom using my proven method. It’s risk-free. You either start seeing results within your first month or I give you your money back. Schedule your call here at www.mayempson.com/contact.  We’ll see you inside.

Want to know more about what happens when you join?

1. When you join Spiritual Achiever® Coaching you’ll be supported for a full year: Career Revelation Academy: A 5-step career change process (if you have a job you want to stay in, I’ll show you how to love it even more) that can launch you into your next career chapter in 30 days.
2. 2x/month group training and coaching on Spirituality, Achievement, Earth Energy and Harmony. You’ll know how to design your days for breakthroughs, create a personal brand and community, lead yourself and others through change, become more physically and mentally fit, reduce stress and reinvent what’s possible in this next chapter of your life.
3. Discover your Leadership Strengths and Branding Workshop: Increase your awareness of what makes YOU different from others and how to become even better at your genius zone.
4. Your Best Year workshop: Create your one year plan and design this next year, no matter what time of the year it is.
5. Your Next 5 Years one-day virtual retreat: Vision what’s possible 5 years from now and break out of your old routines so you can step into new habits, behaviors and routines.
6. Tickets to all in-person Spiritual Achiever retreats (discounted rates): Highly immersive and intimate gatherings where we spend time in nature, experience energy work, eat and move well – all while making big decisions and committing to what’s next for us.
7. Monthly 1:1 Coaching Sessions: To help you break through obstacles, define your individual path, and to work on both strategy and mindset.

The next step?

Schedule a consultation to get clarity on how coaching can help you on your journey.

Once you’re accepted into the program, you’ll receive a calendar invite for a 2-hour deep dive 1:1 session to map out your personal goals and your own year-long journey.

You’ll have immediate access to the Spiritual Achiever process and philosophy – how to achieve your biggest goals and reinvent your life.

You’ll have immediate access to 5 modules of Career Revelation Academy – to love your career even more and launch that next chapter of your career in 30 days.

You’ll have the calendar invites for the upcoming group calls and retreats.

If this speaks to you, I can’t wait to talk to you live: Schedule a consultation.

Reach out at www.mayempson.com/contact for more information on my Spiritual Achiever coaching program. You’ll figure out what’s next and actually go and do it. 

That’s it for this week. Have an amazing one and I’ll talk to you next time.